Held hostage by my bed

Yes that's right, my bed has held me hostage.I've tried contacting the police but they don't see it as a serious crime. It is very serious.

You see it all started when I went to the dentist.unfortunately I had to have a filling and because I have a hickman line( goes into my chest to feed me) I have to have antibiotics.

I came out of the place of torture looking like I'd been dragged through a bush.My body does not cope well with procedures anymore.

After that I've been stuck in bed. To unwell to sit up. I eventually made it to the doctors and it turns out I have a vitamin d definciency. Ok so maybe I can stop blaming the dentist now.

I am slowly getting back to my normal but am in to much pain to sit in my wheelchair for long. So while I've been stuck in bed,I've been doing some drawing. Ta da here they are.




I would say enjoy the weather but maybe not as it's raining here x 



Home grown veg and a Strawberry

Last year my lovely carer decided to move to Australia. I know I know how dare she move to a place with sun sea sand and sexy Australian men.

Anyway, before she left she gave me her tomato plants.I had never grown anything so I was very excited. Every morning I would rush out to check for tomatoes.

Now a year on I have a slight obsession with growing veg.I've reached my limit on space now though so can't grow anything else.At the moment I've got potatoes, onions,carrots,lettuce,sweetcorn,tomatoes and a strawberry plant.

There are a few things I've learnt not to do along the way so I will share them.

1. When you have carrots seedlings in a pot, don't knock the whole pot over with the hose pipe. Rip carrots.

2. Don't put the whole lot of lettuce seeds into one pot.They die. Rip lettuce.

This isn't a very good start is it.

I did end up buying lettuce plants though which survived.

3. Don't leave your potato plant a whole week without water as it starts off like this.



And ends up like this 



Sorry mr potato plant.The potatoes survived though. Yay.

4. It seems a frog likes to live in a potato plant, so be aware when your picking potatoes not to accidently run it over with your wheelchair.Sorry mr froggy. Rip

5. Strawberry plants. I am having a battle with the birds. I left a strawberry to ripen and was saving it before I picked it. I came rushing out of the house super excited only to find it had been half eaten. I was a very sad hayley. But i managed to get one strawberry and here is the evidence.



See I don't kill everything. By the way it was delicious.

Hope you all learnt something from my failures. Have a good day.

Hayley x 



reflecting on turning 33 and getting grey hair

So next week on the 12th July it's my birthday.I will be the grand old age of 33. Yikes. How did i get to 33 and not feel any different to when i was 18. The grey hair is creeping in but luckily my boobs aren't big enough to go down south yet.

I've been doing some reflecting on the hopes and dreams i had when i was younger. Life isn't how i imagined it would be. I thought by this time i would be married with children and have a good job.Well thats whats supposed to happen isn't it. Were the movies lying to me all this time and not many people have their happy ever after.

This post sounds depressing already but i will chuck in a few more depressing things to really get the vibe going.  I became ill at 19. If i hadn't of become unwell then i wouldn't have gone to uni at 23 to carry on what i left off at 18. I'm confusing myself here.

I then lost the ability to walk five years ago and then my stomach stopped working about 3 years ago ,so i've been tube fed/ tpn dependent for 2 years. I have dated in this time but i never met the right person.I don't have alot of confidence as i think i'm alot for a person to take on.

I also won't be having children as i don't think it would be fair on a child, but its not all doom and gloom.

Although my life has taken a different path than i imagined it has taught me so much. I appreciate little things like flowers growing or birds singing. I make the most of my good days as you never know when your going to get sick.I appreciate family and never take things for granted. I think i have a good life and overall i can say i'm happy.

Even more happy that i got i'd for a scratchcard.I burst out laughing but the cashier was serious.

So to end my speech, here is a photo of me in my new glasses.My carer calls them my geek glasses haha.




I hope you all have a good day

Hayley x 



Scandinavian inspired print and Skillshare

So I was browsing online for craft classes and i came across Skillshare. You pay a small monthly free and you have access to over 16,000 classes. Some of the subjects covered are Photography, Drawing, surface pattern, watercolour and sewing.You can check it out here https://www.skillshare.com

While i was on skillshare i discovered a surface pattern class inspired by scandinavian design.I really enjoyed going through the process and coming up with a final design. I learnt so much in photoshop and illustrator.

Here's my pattern 


I think i'm all designed out now so have decided to do abit of sewing.Yesterday i went to the nec for the stitching show.I was very restrained and spent the total sum of £9 hehe. I'm trying to use up what i have in my craftroom, although i did have a lovely day out.

Hayley x

Studying a make it in design course


Many years ago I completed a degree in Surface Design. I always knew i wanted a career in design but possibly produce products with my prints on ( not my hand prints of course)

When i left uni, i did a days work experience at a design studio. This was where my confidence was knocked and i just wasn't good enough. The course i did didn't teach adobe illustrator which is kin of the industry standard now so i was already at a disadvantage.

Sadly after this my health declined so i put my dream on hold. Not to long ago i came across an online course called make it in design https://makeitindesign.com . There are 3 modules and each teaches you all about the world of surface pattern.It gives you exercises to do, industry knowledge and also technical workshops in photoshop and illustrator.

I'm really enjoying the course.I don't have a plan for what i want to do at the end as my health is so unpredictable. I'm loving the journey though.

That's enough of me waffling on. Here's a pattern i made that i think would be great on children's products.



Lots of love, Hayley x



I'm ready to start blogging again

As the title says.I'm ready to start blogging again. Still need to get around to doing my blog header oops.

Brief update healthwise. Last time i blogged i was still in hospital. My old hickman line had to come out as it had dislodged and the one my local hospital put in was to short. I also had my peg remove ( feeding tube into stomach) as i know longer used it due to being on tpn and fed into my blood stream.

Unfortunately when the was removed i developed sepsis.Luckily antibiotics were started within an hour so i made a full recovery. I spent a month in hospital before coming home. I am now starting to feel abit better and starting to do things.

I am doing an online courses or courses at the moment so i may overload you with patterns. Also i've been in the garden growing lots of veg.It makes me so happy seeing things grow from seed.

Mia the cat is doing well without molly and let me take a few photo's of her with my new camera.



She's not always this cute.She brought me a bird yesterday.Naughty mia.

Anyway bye for now, i hope to be more consistant in my blogging (and maybe spelling)

Hayley x 

Dear diary - Things are tough at the moment -part 1

Dear diary

I haven't updated you for a long time.I didn't think i have anything to say but now i really need you.

The last time I updated was before christmas.I was due to start tpn as my weight was so low and i was having trouble with my tube feeds.

I went into hospital and had a picc line inserted into my arm and then started tpn. It gives nutrients directly into your blood stream bypassing the organs. It doesn't come without risks including sepsis and liver damage.

After a month in hospital i came home.It took a while for my body to adjust but about a month ago i was finally feeling well enough to start living again.

Things were good until march 4th.I will always remember that day.I had my beloved molly put to sleep. Devastated  was an understatement.



I got molly when i first became ill 13 years ago. She was my best friend and always by my side. She stopped eating and the vet thought she had cat flu but could feel an inflamed kidney aswell. I nursed her at home for two weeks.She couldn't really walk so i carried her on my lap in my wheelchair around the house.

I knew i was loosing her but wanted her to pass away at home. It wasn't fair on either of us.She was sad and so was i. It was time to take her back to the vets who thought she probably had kidney cancer.It was time to put my baby girl to sleep. I was buy her side until the end.She didn't even stop wagging her tail.She always thought she was a dog hehe.

She passed away a month before her 13th birthday and left behind her sister mia.

Surprisingly mia has coped very well and is a changed cat. She was always with molly but quite timid around people. She now can't get enough fuss from people.

I have wrote alot in this post so will write a part 2 of my thoughts x 

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Loves textiles, stitching and anything cute. Daily battle with ehlers danlos syndrome, gastroparesis and tube fed x

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